your needs, my needs
"What if the devil doesn't know she's the devil?" This quote has been on my mind a lot lately. It really sums up a lot of what goes on in my head. The questioning, the overanalyzing, the contradictions, the anxiety that makes me freeze when I need to be moving. What if I am doing the wrong thing and I don't even know it? What if I'm actually delusional when I think I'm so self-aware? What if the people around me see someone completely different than I do? How do I know when to trust my thoughts and when they are just a product of the anxiety, the depression, the trauma response? Nobody can give me an answer. Which is fair. How can I expect them to, when I can't even answer it myself? How do you explain your fucked up brain to someone who is normal, who doesn't have thoughts racing 100% of the time, who doesn't question every tiny thing? How do you know they won't run when they see what an absolute nutcase you are, and how do you blame th